My blog has moved.

Here is my blog's new address: http://ashleycrist.com

I will be keeping this page up for some time, but this will be my last post on this page.

I look forward to sharing updates with you on my new site.

Thanks,
Ash

Thankful Thursdays: Thunderstorms

I love thunderstorms. I always want to cozy up and make a hot drink while watching them come through.

I like how the sky gets dark and closes in. I like sitting indoors and hearing the thunder. And I enjoy the sound of the rain coming down outside.

My favorite storms are the cold fronts that come in right as the seasons are changing from winter to spring. In Houston it never gets very cold, but right before it rains, the temperature still drops enough to feel a change in the air.

After I moved to Kansas, I could really tell the difference between spring thunderstorms and fall thunderstorms. The ones in the spring can get pretty violent, and sometimes produce tornadoes. Fall storms bring a lot more of those slow, steady rains.

And the smell of the rain during spring has a freshness, whereas in the fall it's more crisp.

You don’t get thunderstorms very often in Delhi, even during the monsoons, so I definitely miss them a lot here. I hope that where ever we move next has a rainier climate so I can enjoy stormy days indoors again.

Homesick

“Our Father refreshes us on the journey with some pleasant inns, but will not encourage us to mistake them for home.” - C.S. Lewis, from The Problem of Pain

I get pretty homesick here in New Delhi.

I'm not sure what triggers it, but I think it's mainly just a craving I get for things that are familiar.

Sometimes I'll think about Houston and all the places that I like visit when I'm there. 

Or sometimes I'll think about my mother-in-law's place, where it's surrounded by nature and quiet. 

Other times I'll think about our old apartment in Kansas City, with all the bike trails nearby and how close it was to all the places we liked to eat and shop.

In my heart I'll feel a longing for these places. I want to go back and live there again. I want to hear the familiar quiet, smell the familiar smells, and see the familiar things.

I want to be back where I'm comfortable and I know my way around. I want to be where I know all the best places to buy groceries, where I can anticipate the change in seasons, and where I know what to expect from the culture.

But during our last trip to the US, as I was enjoying being home for a little while, I couldn't shake this thought: "No matter how much I may miss the US, the US is not my home."

Yes, it's true.

America is a beautiful and blessed country. And I'm thankful to have been lived twenty-five out of twenty-six years of my life in such a prosperous nation.

But it's not my home.

It's as temporary a dwelling place as India. A fleeting shadow. And I'm just as much a foreigner there as I am here in India.

I have a more secure and permanent home hidden in the person of Jesus.

And as much as I long to be "home", Jesus is aching to find His home in me too. When He was with his disciples He told them He had no place to rest His head. (Mt. 8:20)

We're both homesick. And we can only find our true homes in one another.

It's just like Jesus said: if we dwell in Him, He will also dwell in us. (Jn 15:4)

So as much as I ache to be physically back in the US, what I'm really aching for is the fullness of the Kingdom to be made manifest. Because my true home, united and alive in Christ, is being continually built up for all eternity.

Singapore

View of Singapore's skyline from Marina Bay.

Michael and I just got back from Singapore this past Sunday.

I enjoyed Singapore. In so many ways it's a complete 180〫from Delhi. For it's size and population density, there's hardly any traffic or pollution. And the amount of greenery is amazing.

It's really impressive to see how they've made the most of the limited space and resources they have.

But for all the things I liked about Singapore, I enjoyed the time we spent with a couple of our friends the most.

It made me think about the value that relationships have, and how without relationships, our lives are incredibly empty.

No matter whether we're in a pristine a city like Singapore or a chaotic scramble like Delhi, life is only meaningful when it's lived out in relationship with Jesus and those around us.

Sharing dinner and dessert with our friends.

I confess, I've left Jesus out of a lot of my traveling experiences. And as much as I've enjoyed all the places we've been able to visit, without Him, I've only been appreciating them at a superficial level.

But Jesus is more alive than any man and the only one who truly knows how to live life to the fullest. If He's not the focus, what's the point?

And if I really want my heart to be fully alive and living in the present, I need be in relationship with the Lord and invite Him into my experiences abroad.

Thankful Thursdays: Autumn

Taken outside Yellow Farmhouse Winery in Defiance, MO.

The official first day of Autumn in the US was September 22nd this year.

By now, at home they're experiencing cool, crisp evenings, the smells of apple cider, spiced nuts and fruits, and restaurants are offering pumpkin-flavored this or that.

I love it when I walk into Hobby Lobby and that country, crafty aroma hits me first thing. It's like heaven being in their store. The combination of cinnamon, cloves, and orange-cranberry candles is divine.

Autumn's the beginning of baking season, which means I get to bake and eat as much pumpkin pie as I can manage.

It's also when I get to start wearing all my favorite scarves and sweaters. Then in the evenings, when Michael and I watch movies, we'll snuggle up with hot tea and blankets.

In September, the trees in Kansas usually start to turn colors. It may not be as pretty as other places in America, but after growing up in Houston, I always thought it was special.

Right before Michael and I moved to India, most of our things were getting boxed up for storage or for shipping. We kept our bikes out for as long as we could. Almost every evening we took them out and rode along various bike trails or through nearby neighborhoods. It was probably the most memorable thing we did before we moved… and it’s probably the thing I miss the most.

There really isn’t a Fall season here in Delhi, so I’ll miss it again this year, but I’m thankful for it all the same.

Autumn really is my favorite time of the year.

Blaming

Several weeks ago, I had been spending quite a bit of time whining and complaining about living here in Delhi. After a few minutes of going on and on, God finally asked me: "What will you do when you don't have India to blame anymore?"

I felt like I had just been woken up. And then I thought back to all the other occasions in my life where I went looking for people or things to blame. Talk about an unattractive personality trait.

I started to wonder where that came from and why I always felt the need to look outwards for scapegoats.

I traced a lot of it back to a feeling of helplessness and lack of control.

In the case of being here in India, I feel completely at the mercy of the people, the places and the culture. I don't always know where I'm at or how to communicate my needs to those around me, so I feel frustrated and defeated.

When we were in Rome, we had to figure out how to use the underground metro system to get around the city. As we were sitting on the train I thought to myself, "No one else is going to do things for you, only you can be responsible for how you live your life."

It's no different here in Delhi. Yes, this is a hard place to live. Yes, it's hard to learn the language. Yes, it's hard to know whether you're being told the truth or not. But in the end, no one else is going to figure all that out for me. No one else is going to step in and take over responsibility for my things for me.

Michael and I deliberately chose to move to Delhi. Over the course of a year, we made decision after decision that enabled us to come and live in this place. We had even visited Delhi on 3 different occasions before we accepted the offer to come here. We knew what we were getting ourselves into. (Well, maybe we didn't know about that one part about not touching your dishwasher after the geyser pipe bursts water all over the place. One word: Electrocution.)

I don't want to be like the servant who intentionally chose to bury his talent in the ground, and had the audacity to blame the Master for his own actions. I can't go on blaming India, or anyone else, for all my problems and discomforts. 

If I'm not stewarding this season here well, it's time for me to stop shifting the responsibility on others and start asking myself why.